Separated at Birth?
by RumbleintheDumbles
Summary: What if Ruby discovered she had a long-lost sibling? And another one? And another one? ...And another one? And... yeah, they really, really needed to call Dad.


**A/N: Noticed a few of this type of fic in the fandom on here recently and decided to jot down something quickly. We've all seen 'What if Ruby found out she had a long-lost sister/brother?' Here's my short take on it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own RWBY. It belongs to Rooster Teeth.**

* * *

Ruby Rose, huntress-in-training and fearless leader of Team RWBY, groaned in misery as she heard the now all-too-familiar sound of a knock on the door. Sighing, she got up from her bed to open it.

"Hello?" she internally cried as she took in the appearance of the red-haired girl who was standing awkwardly at the door. "Can I help you?"

"Ah... um, yes. This is awkward."

"I've noticed from the last few that it seems to help if you get to the point quickly," Ruby told her helpfully.

"Last few?"

"Don't worry about that, just go on."

"You see, Ruby, I don't know how to say this, but... my name is Autumn Rose, and I am-"

"-Our long-lost sister, right?" Ruby sighed.

The other redhead blinked. "Er, yes. How did you know?"

"Yang!" Ruby announced in resignation, "Another one."

"Another one?" Yang audibly sighed from inside. "What's this one?"

"Sister, Rose," Ruby informed her.

The older sibling of the Xiao Long/Rose household came to the door of their room, holding a check-list. "Okay, so that gives us eight Xiao Long's, ten Roses and seven Branwens... still don't know whose name that is..." she sighed in disbelief, "Right, I'm calling Dad again. I've had enough of this."

"Er..." the new girl looked confused, "I don't understand what's going on."

"Apparently," Ruby held a hand to her forehead, "Our dad wasn't really too careful when he was younger. You're not the first long-lost sibling we've met since we got here. In fact, you're-"

"-Dad, this is the _twenty-fifth one!"_ they heard Yang shout down the phone in the background, "We've only been here _three days!_ How many women did you _sleep with?!"_

"Well... that many," Ruby finished awkwardly, "You're actually the fifth Autumn we've had today. Apparently Dad wasn't very creative with the naming process."

"Damn it, Dad! This is _your_ problem, _you_ get up here and fix it! I'm not ready to take care of a _god damn clan!"_

"What is all of this noise?" Weiss asked as she approached their room.

"Another three since you left for the library," Ruby explained, "Autumn the Fifth here is the latest one."

Weiss shook her head in disbelief. "You know, Ruby, when I said my family was the biggest in Remnant, I didn't mean quantitatively, and it _definitely_ wasn't supposed to be a challenge," she turned her attention to the newcomer, " _Let me guess_. There's something 'special' about you, too?"

"Ah," the girl wilted under the scathing gaze of the Schnee Heiress, "Well, I was told my semblance is really unique -"

" _Everyone's_ semblance is unique, genius," Weiss rolled her eyes, "That's _how it works._ "

"Well, uh... I... I have this special weapon?"

" _Really,_ " Weiss said, sounding impressively unimpressed, "Let's see it, then."

"Is Weiss bullying your unexpected family members again?" Blake sounded amused as she also came into sight.

"Yes," Ruby confirmed, "I'm starting to think she actually enjoys it. I heard her muttering in her sleep about a 'target-rich environment' this morning. But between you and me?" her voice dropped to a whisper, "I don't really mind if it means she's not bullying me."

Blake shook her head. "Well, I'm sorry to dump another problem in your lap, but," she suddenly looked awkward, "Can you do something about your... well, brothers? They can't seem to leave me alone. I was trying to enjoy a quiet book in the library when all eight of them came in and started trying to talk to me," she frowned, "Then they all started fighting with each other over something, and got me kicked out. It was rather frustrating."

"Yeah, I think I know what the problem is," Yang had reappeared, "I'll get Dad to talk to them when he gets here," she then thought about the past events that had led to them discovering that their family was now more populous than most of Beacon's classes, "Actually, you know what? I'll talk to them. I'll talk to them all right now."

"Thank you," Blake nodded gratefully.

"-And on top of that, your weapon is _completely_ unoriginal. It's the _tenth_ katana we've seen in the last eight hours, the _seventh_ one that doubles as a sniper rifle and the _fourth_ that can be dual-wielded alongside it's sheath. God, it's like you people have somehow managed to become your own _category_ of cliché!"

Ruby waved off her new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new sibling as she ran away in tears. "Bye! Don't forget to turn up to the family meeting tomorrow! It's in the main hall," she sighed again, "The only room in the campus that's big enough at this point."

"Sorry, am I interrupting something?"

Ruby looked up at the new arrival. A boy this time. "Hold on a moment," she told him, disappearing into their room before he could say anything, "I need to grab the check-list. Where did she leave it... ah, here," she reappeared, "Okay, I'm going to try and do this one a bit differently. Name, gender, family status, semblance, weapon. Go."

"Uh..." the boy looked highly confused.

"Gender?" Blake asked curiously.

"Yeah, gender. Those eight brothers who were following you around? Well... not all of them were actually the brothers," Ruby informed her awkwardly.

"Ah," Blake nodded weakly, "Well, on that note, I'm going to bed. Wake me up if something happens that makes sense."

"Will do," Ruby agreed as cheerfully as she could, "Good night."

 _"All right, you,"_ Weiss had already zoned in on the new target, "I missed out on the chance to spar with Jaune today, and I _really_ want to get my fix of poking holes in something stupid. So how about you tell me _all about_ your tragic back-story?"


End file.
